3 Reasons Why Adding, Instead of Subtracting - Is So Crucial for Reaching Your Goals

How are those New Year's Goals going?

Are you reaching your goals?🤔

If your answers are "not well" and "no, not really" - maybe I can help!

During my 20+ years of coaching people in several areas of growth, I have learned a very important strategy for reaching your goals.

It's all about addition.➕

No - you don't have to do math - unless your goal is to get better at math...I guess...hehe!

The key is where you put your focus and energy. Everything is impacted by energy.

So many people prep for the New Year (or any other opportunity for growth) and they start pumping themselves up with thoughts about how they can "give up that soda" or "lose those pesky 15lbs," or "cut out the fast food." They get caught up in a battle of having a stronger will or my self discipline. While those qualities are certainly helpful, they are not really what is the core issue.

Here is a list of what some of the core issues generally are:

1. The goal you set is not what you really want - it is a mask for something else.

2. Your goal is far too general and difficult (versus specific and manageable).

3. You are setting the goal for someone else or to please someone else - but it isn't really what YOU want.

4. You aren't ready for this goal yet...you need to accomplish other steps first.

5. You set the goal from a place of low self-esteem/self-worth and need to do work on loving yourself more first.

6. You need more of the one (or more) of the following to actually reach your goal: Education/Knowledge, Organization, Time Management Skills, A Better Support Team, etc.

As you can see - these are all wonderful reasons to surround yourself with a good support system and hire a Life Coach/Growth Coach - so you can get to the bottom of these possible goal-setting blocks!❤️

You now realize why setting goals and reaching them can be tougher than you thought...but here is the good news...I still have a major tip that might help you, regardless.

Tip = Addition. You are more likely to reach your goals if you use addition.

Addition is positive energy - you are adding something, not forcing yourself to give something up or take something away.

When we are functioning from a place of addition - our energy is that of abundance and we are drawing in more from the universe. (Reason #1)

When we come from a place of subtracting, we are in a state of lack, resistance, and fear. (Reason #2)

Let me give you a simple example. Maybe your soda addiction is gotten a bit out of hand (4 Cokes/day) and the extra caffeine and sugar is keeping you up at night and putting on a few extra pounds. You know it is time to start nourishing your body and mind with hydration instead of sugar, caffeine, and other additives. You feel determined and you set your goal; "I am only going to allow myself to have a soda every other day."

Now you are fired up and you crush your goal the first 4 days. Boom! Then, on day 5, you wake up with a headache, you get to work and your boss drops a mess on your desk to get done by the end of the day and your coworker won't stop talking about their bad relationship...and hello...you're 4 Cokes in and it is 2:30.

Now...you might be starting to think that this goal is tougher than you thought.

Maybe you could purchase yourself a nice shiny new water bottle and a good tea mug. You could make your first goal to drink a minimum of 2 water bottles - with lemon slices in it and two herbal teas - before you are allowed to have a coke each day...and you start by decreasing your 4 Cokes to 2/day in the first 2 weeks. With this goal - you are adding other (positive/hydrating) liquids in to fill that space where you typically grab a Coke.

When adding in more abundance of good things - the time/space in a day gets filled with other stuff and slowly, but surely...the bad habits you acquired to fill time and space...start squeezing themselves out - without you have to put any of your energy or focusing on it. (Reason #3)

Let's Review & Rock This!

Reason #1: Adding draws in positive energy and an abundance of good = YAY!

Reason #2: Subtracting draws in lack, dread, and fear = No Bueno.

Reason #3: Habits form because we are trying to cope with stress and fill space in our lives where we don't really feel like sitting in, or dealing with that stress. We can't navigate this life without some sort of coping strategies - that's for sure! But, there is a big difference between meditation, herbal tea, and epsom salt baths as coping strategies vs. cheese burgers, rum & Cokes, and video games until 2AM.

The Key: Find small additions that impact your life/health/wellness in a positive way; enough so, that it just squeezes out a few of those rum and Cokes.

Many blessings as you crush your goals through addition!